I want to do everything but can’t
And it kills me.
I’ve always been an entrepreneur. In middle school I started my own little lawn care service. I grew it to roughly 20 customers each summer, many of them being repeat customers. At the beginning of my senior year, I took some pictures of a good friend and launched a little photography service. It was somewhat of an overnight success, and I discovered a visual talent I didn’t know I had.
I uploaded a few pictures to Facebook, and they gained quite a bit of traction. The business side of Lennon blushed quite heavily from all of the love and support from family and friends.
I also worked at the local grocery store and a start-up software company (which is doing phenomenal — I’m so happy for them!) called Stoneridge Software. I maintained four jobs simultaneously (hobbies to me because I loved them all so much) while finishing out high school.
I was able to try a lot of “stuff” and it has caused me to have my mind spread out like peanut butter on bread (or toast).
I quickly learned that I have a few talents and things that I thoroughly enjoy doing. I wanted (and still do) want to pursue many of them but have realized that they’re not attainable at the moment.
I’m working quite a few various contract/freelance gigs and have enjoyed many of them. However, this has meant that I’ve had to sacrifice a few golden opportunities for other dreams and ambitions.
And it hurts.
Just because I have a lot on my plate at the moment doesn’t meant that I won’t in a month, or three, or a year. It’s all situational, and I intend on pressing forward and doing what I want to do, even if I’m 50 years old.
I refuse to live a life of “what ifs.”
I want to go to graduate school. Why? I always have wanted a higher education degree, not because I want a better job or to be more qualified. I want to go because of a lifelong aspiration refusing to live a life of what ifs.
I’ve been heavily inspired by the music business and have even thought about law school (did back in high school a little too). I’ve always enjoyed helping people and being an avenue of information for those with questions.
I’ve come to realize, though, that I simply can’t do everything at once. It hurts to tell myself that, but taking on too much is straining myself out. I don’t want to wear myself out so when I do go back to get my graduate degree — or pursue other opportunities — that I’ll have the energy and ambition to go.
Life is precious, so take things day-by-day without wearing yourself out. Focus on who and what you love and go full speed ahead. It can be tough — as things arise and goals change — but it never means you should throw in the towel.
